Thursday, January 6, 2011

El Perro Peligroso - a.k.a - The Danger Dog

Falling out of an all-you-can-drink tequila disaster in the wee hours of the morning, head steaming with sweat, neck covered in lip gloss, and beach sand in my shoes (how did THAT get there) has always brought back fond memories.  While it may be impossible to re-live my late teens, I can, as it has sometimes been said, live vicariously through food.  Enter.....the Tijuana Danger Dog.  Tiny little brown women, slowly grilling tiny little brown dogs, from tiny little white carts positioned strategically outside the club exit door pull in sweaty teens with the wafting odor of grilled onions and bacon.  When you've been filling your stomach with cheap tequila and beer (and subsequently emptying it in the urinal), nothing....and I mean nothing...makes you feel whole again like a bacon wrapped hot dog, TJ style.

The Method:
This is not complicated.  You wrap a hotdog in bacon.  Use a toothpick to secure the bacon while it crisps up around the weenie, then you remove the pick and brown all around.

The Madness:
This is where things get a little bit scary.  The dog must be dressed in the proper fashion, and this means that it has enough fat to re-line your previously decimated esophagus.  The bun is smeared with mayonnaise (an absolute necessity) and mustard.  Because I'm already going all the way here, I melted a small piece of cheese on my dog.  It is then topped with grilled onions, ketchup, and hot sauce.  A bit of pickled jalapeno is optional, because after all, you don't want it causing trouble while you are waiting in line to cross the border.

The last thing anybody is worried about as you file out of a rocking place like the legendary "Club Safari" are calories.  More important things are on your, "was that her real phone number?"  Word to the are only young once.

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